In my wonder years of grade school, when someone did something to hurt me, I would find a way to even the score. I was not inclined to forgive but wired to get revenge. For example, we played football every afternoon after school. A kid named Hal was my nemesis and bigger and stronger than I. No one could stop him and he made it difficult for me to be as good a quarterback as I assumed I was. I resented and was afraid of him at the same time. But one day I figured out how I could change that. When he jumped in the air to block my next pass I threw the ball as hard as I could right into his stomach. It became a hollow victory for me, when I realized the pain I saw on his face. Over the years I have gotten better (sometimes) at just going with the flow rather than doing to others as they have done to me. I am still a work in progress and when I have been lied to, lied about, or hurt in some way, don’t always handle that well. I know Jesus’ words are to forgive and move on, but that is not a natural inclination and often difficult when the hurt continues and just won’t let up. For some reason I was thinking about that today and remembered Jesus’ words from the cross as he asked God to forgive everyone around the cross. He asked for a gift for his accusers, the soldiers who nailed him to a tree, and his friends who had gone into hiding. His prayer was not conditional, as he added “they don’t get it, but forgive them anyway!” Think about that! If anyone deserved justice it was those who were killing and abandoning Jesus, but he asked for immediate forgiveness for them all. Somehow we have missed the point of that prayer and assume when someone asks to be forgiven we have to grant it, but only after they acknowledge their guilt in causing such pain. And yet, those words of Jesus ring in my ears. Such irony that Jesus’ love was strong enough to ask forgivienss for unrepentant, clueless people. Sin is nothing other than selfishness gone wild and often people have no clue how imperfect they really are. And yet God’s love is their gift. Jesus died for me, forgiving me, before I was even born. That is the key to the Gospel. God doesn’t wait for any of us to turn to him before he will love or forgive, but puts his cards on the table from the beginning and says “my love forgives you.” No one deserves such treatment or grace and yet it is God’s gift. Our response is to hear what he has said, remember the price paid for such a gift, and allow such a divine love to change my avenging nature into a lifestyle that learns how to forgive others even when it isn’t easy, isn’t deserved, and they might continue to make me hurt. The fact we will never love perfectly is not an excuse not to give it a try. Jesus simply asks that we learn to forgive as he has done for us. Such a deal!
